Once in the Morning Lyrics

I was lying in state on my analyst′s couch
I said, "Doc, I get the feeling I'm becoming a grouch
You know, my arches are falling and I′m developing a slouch"
He said, as he reached inside his hot pants for his alligator pouch
And he said

Once in the morning and once at night
I'm not sure that it'll help you, but you′ll think it′s alright
Once in the afternoon and once at twilight
Once for the money and again 'round midnight

I was playing Las Vegas, I was feeling kinda flat
When Jan the Fan Dancer came by for a chat
You know, she loosened up her A string and she reached inside her hat
And she said, "You play with this, son, I′ll play with that"

Once in the morning and once at night
I'm not sure that it′ll help you, but you'll think it′s alright
Once in the afternoon and once at twilight
Once for the money and again 'round midnight

I was hanging 'round London trying to pick up a new line
When a man I did not know, he invited me to dine
He said, "We can make each other happy
You know, we′re both the same kind
And I′ll like some of yours if you'll
Please take some of mine," yeah, yeah

Once in the morning and once at night
I′m not sure that it'll help you, but you′ll think it's alright
Once in the afternoon and once at twilight
Once for the money and again
Once for the money and again
Once for the money and again