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If you were a wise man
Baby, you would drop every other ho, ho, ho
And put me on top
Up there on your tree
Better treat me like a star
Spend your cookie dough, dough, dough
Spend it on my heart

Fuck the jet
Send the sleigh
It′s a packed holiday and I got options, babe

If you don't wanna buy me presents
Drink me like a warm glass of milk
If you′re not gonna race here from the North Pole to Beverly Hills
Just to keep my stocking filled
Well, I know somebody who will

Somebody who will (uh-huh)
Somebody who will
Somebody who will
Buy me presents, baby

He's a little bit older (like, super old)
Got a bit of a dad bod
From a city that's colder (brrr)
But damn it, he′s so hot
He knows when I′m sleeping (sleeping)
And he knows when I'm not
I haven′t like, seen him in a while
He's probably just busy at his workshop

Fuck the jet (fuck the jet)
Send the sleigh (send the sleigh)
It′s a packed holiday and I got options, babe

If you don't wanna buy me presents
Drink me like a warm glass of milk (oh)
If you′re not gonna race here from the North Pole to Beverly Hills
Just to keep my stocking filled (so filled)
Well, I know somebody who will

Somebody who will
Somebody who will
Somebody who will
Buy me presents, baby

If you don't wanna buy me presents
Drink me like a warm glass of milk (drink me like a warm glass of milk)
If you're not gonna race here from the North Pole to Beverly Hills
Just to keep my stocking filled
Well, I know somebody who will

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